Since everyone’s upset about me quitting, I’ve come up with an ingenius plan. And no, I’m not going to infect the world’s cats with itcy-scratchy virus. I don’t want to write about CP anymore, but to keep you lot with a healthy dose of anarchy, wit and craziness, I have opened a new website, the Edge of Night. Here, I will make witty posts and random utterings. I hope to see you guys at the Edge! Oh, and, just for old time’s sake, I’ll do one last update: the CPIP features are on their way and will be out soon! Goodbye, and thank you!

I have decided it’s time I quit this website. I’ve done it for a year and more and I’ve finally had enough. I don’t get to enjoy CP updates as much if I have to get on and update. And also, I really don’t see the point of doing this. I mean, Google gives me about 378,000 results for “Club Penguin Cheats”. So there are hundreds of other CP sites all doing the exact same thing.. unnessacarily. If you honestly do need help on CP, just go to one of the other CP sites, of which there are many. Basically, by updating you’re just telling everyone stuff that they could easily find out themselves either by playing CP or going on another site. All CP sites are pretty much pointless. And I don’t get many hits, either. So, I am leaving this website, as is Black Bandit. We will miss you guys, but we will still play Club Penguin and I will go on the Miniclip Club Penguin Forums.

The popular play, Squidzoid vs. Shadow Guy and Gamma Girl, has returned to the Stage. It’s got a new background, but other than that it’s pretty much the same. The set is slightly different.

The new catalog is on FIRE! It’s awesome- too bad I’m a non-member. Anyway, it’s got lots of musical items, which supports my musical party theory. These items include the conductor suit (this week’s On the Job feature), an Elvis looking jacket, a stripey pink and white T-shirt with a musical note on it, orange sneakers and an orange rocker shirt. There’s also the return of the cowboy gear! However, the jacket is not back. The rest of the Western stuff is though- and they’ve brought a sunburst finished guitar with them. There are musical related backgrounds (3 old, 1 new). There is also a new wig catalog. Now for the pin, the new pin is the rocket firework pin and it’s located at the Cove on the umbrella- is about the fireworks or a message from RocketSnail? It’s really cool and ties with the apple in my favourite pin ranks. P.S. I have the day off school today due to a teacher training day.

Sorry this update is late- my computer has been unavailable all weekend. Anyway, I might as well update about Rockhopper coming. He has returned in the Migrator with a free parrot for non-members to buy, as well as member items. These member items are the grey pirate coat, the striped sash dress, the ship-in-a-bottle (furniture item) and the pink flamingo (furniture item). There’s also a new sports catalog with new sports equipment. That’s all for now!

1. Talk to G. His machine is keeping track of all the tremours. G will tell you that a tremour is happening at the Dock. But before you go, there are a few things you should get from the HQ.

2. Pick up a mallete and the brown fedora hat.

3. Now you can go to the Dock. A big drilling machine will come out of the ground. Unsuprisingly, Herbert is in with Klutzy behind him in a little cart. Listen to him going on about his latest mad plan.

4. He will explain that he is digging the tunnels as a distraction for his next scheme. He says we won’t be able to stop him unless we have a map showing the tunnel network. The map will fly out of his paws. When Klutzy grabs it, it will split into two pieces.

5. Once Herbert’s machine falls into the hole go to the Town and chase after the map.

6. Notice the Gift Shop has sunken into the ground. Go into the Coffee Shop and help the penguin pick up the cookies, which look very tasty. Tasty pixels… Mmm…

7. Take a cookie. Now go outside and give the cookie to the green puffle outside the Night Club. He will try and get the half of the map that is stuck in the Night Club sign.

8. Go back into the Coffee Shop and get another cookie.

9. Go back to the Town and give the green puffle the fedora hat. Then give him a cookie and he’ll get the piece of the map for you.

10. Now go to the Snow Forts and chase the other piece of the map. It will get stuck on the Snow Forts flag, but if you give it a good nudge it will fly into the Plaza.

11. The map piece will get stuck in one of the penguins queueing for the Stage’s newspaper. Talk to him. Because he’s a pain, he won’t give you the map. He can only be bribed by food, so get him a double meat pizza with extra grey fish.

12. When he asks what he can do for you in return, ask for the newspaper and get the map piece out.

13. Now you need to rescue the Gift Shop but they’re are a few things you must do first. Go the Beach and get a fishing net. Then go in the Lighthouse and get a barrel of cream soda.

14. Now go to the Sport Shop and get some pegs from the tent display.

15. Now go back to the Dock, pick up the lantern and go down the hole made earlier by Herbert and Klutzy.

16. Now open the first map piece and it will either say left or right. Go through the left tunnel enterance or the right tunnel enterance depending on what your map says.

17. It will now be dark, so take our your lantern. If you are/were a member and have the night vision goggles, you can also use them for this bit. However, I would recommend using the lantern.

18. Now just follow the map until you come to the sunken Gift Shop.

19. Take out the cream soda barrel and shake it. And I mean shake it. Just move you mouse about really fast for a bit. Now for this bit, you won’t have time to look back at my instructions, so just read it now and remember what to do. Put the shaken barrel under the Gift Shop and it will explode, sending the Gift Shop up. Then use the net on the Gift Shop and it will attatch itself to it. Now use the pegs to pin the net to the Gift Shop. Finally, hammer the pegs down. Do it now.

20. Sorry about that. You have to do it quick or the Gift Shop falls down again, which means you have to repeat everything from step # 13. Anyway, the Gift Shop is now safe. Carry on through the tunnel and you will enter a room containing Herbert’s digging machine.

21. Use the spanner in your spy phone to get the gear out of the machine.

22. Now move a bit to your left and you will see a hole in the wall which leads to the Boiler Room. Go in it. Herbert is trying to nick the boiler. Tell Herbert to stop what he is doing.

23. The following dialouge between you and Herbert is hillarious. I like the bit where you say “I don’t think it was luck. I stopped your plan to chop down the Ski Lodge witha  pizza,”. Anyway, Herbert gets really angry and punches the boiler.

24. He will run away. Suprisingly, he tells you to save yourself- so give him a gold star for that.

25. G will ring you and tell you to fix the boiler.

26. To start fixing the boiler, click the door on the boiler.

27. Ahhhhh! You will see a grid of pipes. It looks hard, but trust me, it’s not that difficult. Just click a pipe and then click another pipe to swap them around. You just have the get the pipes to connect up the pipe in the bottom right hand corner and the pipe in the top left hand corner.

28. See? Wasn’t that hard was it? Once you’ve fixed the boiler, G will ring you. He tells you to get to the HQ straight away.

29. Before you talk to G, go to the gadget room and click the Thing-Majig 3004. It now has a robotic arm that will try and get a ball into a cup. It fails, as usual.

30. Okay, you can talk to G now. Tell him you found the gear and give it to him.

Mission Complete.

Mission 8 has arrived. It’s called Mysterious Tremours. As soon as I have completed it, a mission guide will be posted on this website. Got to go and do the mission now, bye!

There has been an earthquake in the Town Centre of Club Penguin, leaving the Gift Shop, Coffee Shop, Book Room, Dance Lounge and Night Club damaged. I urge you NOT to drill, as this will only make it worse! I’m sure this is Herbert’s doing, but we’ll find out next week when the new mission comes out. The new igloo furniture came out yesterday, with old and new summer items. The new pin, a basketball, is hidden in the Pizza Parlour. Sorry this update’s late, it’s my birthday tomorrow, so I had a party yesterday with lots of my friends, including Tylerhere07, Doglovescat, Dudemaster1995 and General Glouster.

I regret to inform you that Viren has left our team. After my perma-ban on the Miniclip Forums, we were talking and he accused me of hacking. I told him that I never hack and that he didn’t have his facts straight. He continued to say that all SWFs are hacking. I said they’re not, they can just be used for hacking. He wouldn’t listen. I then said that I hoped everyone on the forums didn’t hate me. He said they all did. I said they didn’t; they’re my friends, to which he consistently said they did. I got angry and had a go at him for accusing me of something I didn’t do and saying everyone hated me. He then made a pathetic excuse saying that his brother had said all that, when I know he didn’t. Apparently, due to the fact that he had to convince me it was his brother, his Mum grounded him. I don’t see why his Mum would ground him for that. He said it was my fault he was grounded when it wasn’t. He then sarcastically said Thank You and said he would give me a “present” for supposedly getting him grounded. Fearing the saftey of my site, I removed Viren from the users of this site in case he planned on wrecking it. If you’re reading this, Viren, I am sorry it had to end like this. You seem quite mean and rude and that’s not the sort of person we want on this site. I have learnt my lesson from this incident. From now on, if I even hire another admin, I will make sure it’s someone I know in real life so I know if they have a good personality. I will now be posting Viren’s topics.

Club Penguin’s second water party is here! It’s got great decorations and lots of fun features. In the corner of most rooms, you’ll see a green hose. If you click this, you can spray people! Also, at the Cave and the Mine, you can find out how the first Water Party started. The decoratios are great: the Plaza is an ice cream market, the Dock has a huge ice castle, the Night Club is a splash club and the Ice Rink is a swimming pool. My particular favourite room is the Cove because if its awesome waterfall and palm trees. There’s also a new room at the Iceberg; an inflatable blue whale. I think it is like the Tree Fort, so it will only be around for this party. ithink this is a new tradition of CP’s. Also, “Ollie the Octopus” is back in the Dojo in a pool party. Oh, and you throw water balloons instead of snowballs like last year. Now for the items. The yellow inflatable duck is back at the Cove, while the ice cream apron can be found at the Plaza. The seashell necklace is at the Beach. The new Stage play is also out today. It’s called the Penguins That Time Forgot and it’s a bit random- a guy called Chester finds a time machine and meets these random cavepenguins. But whatever…

The new newspaper is out. It’s got an advert for the Water Party, coming tomorrow, as well as info about the Penguin “Secret” Agency. If you click the word “secret” in the newspaper, you’ll see a secret agent message- de-code it! The new play “The Penguins That Time Forgot” looks good according to the advert in the newspaper. The In Focus feature is on the Pet Shop, there are tips on giving tours and the review is on the Penguin Tales ‘08 book. The events page has been upgraded; it now has stylish boxes containing information and pictures about upcoming events. Also, just like last week’s newspaper, there’s a summer sneak page. These sneak peeks seem to show the return of the superhero play, new igloo furniture and a penguin playing the tuba. When you move your mouse over the word “Parties”, it says we should “tune” in for more parties in the summer season. With this and the tuba picture to back me up, I am fairly confident that there will be a music party (probabally in July), which I look forward to alot! What do you think the Water Party will be like tomorrow? I think it’s possible the yellow duck/red sunglasses will come out, since they have been seen in recent newspapers. What do you think?

Airea has closed her blog because of stupid bullies on YouTube bullying her! Please support Airea and show her that we are on her side. It’s so unfair that mean people can stop us doing the things we like! You rock Airea! Remember: make a stand, wear a band!

We have begun our Summer Improvement Project, which we hope will make this site even better than it already is- yes that is possible. We have begun by merging the Fan Art page with the Funny Pictures page, because really they both count as art because I have applied creativity in order to make them. You might also notice our new page, Doctor Who. Me and Madmethven are Doctor Who mad, so we’ve decided to open a page where our viewers can discuss things with us. This week we’re discussing the latest episode, “Forest of the Dead”. Please tell us what you think of these improvements, as well as what else can be done to improve the site.

We have uploaded a new header, which is great even if I do say so myself. It was made using Adobe Photoshop 7.0. It shows my favourite pins out of my selection of at least 25. The header shows me and Madmethven. Doglovescat and Viren aren’t on it because I don’t know their look. When they contact me and let me know their penguin looks. We will be making some changes to the Club Penguin Guide in the next few months, as part of our Summer Improvement Project. We would appreciate you telling us what sort of things we can improve on the website. Anyone that helps us out by giving us suggestions for what we can improve will recieve a reward once the improvements are complete.

The new clothing catalog is out and it’s full of summer clothes. Included are a variety of swimsuits. CP put in a cool feature, where if you move your mouse over the BUY button for a swim suit, it will show you what the swim suit looks like on a penguin in the catalog. There are also blue and green sandals and a weird dress with dots on it. There’s also a new diver’s suit. The On the Job feature is a lifeguard. The backgrounds are three old ones and a new one. The old ones are the beach background, and the blue/pink floral backgrounds (which were really rare). The new pin has also arrived, it’s an ice cream cone and it’s located at the Forest. Finally, check out the CPIP blog for a sneak peek of the new player card system which looks very well organised.

I am afraid I am not recruiting admins anymore, since no one has applied. However, I have found a penguin named Viren who some of you may know from the Miniclip Club Penguin Forums. He will be a new worker on this site and it will be his job to update about igloo related news and the sports catalog. He will tell you a bit about himself in a few days. Be very nice to Viren or I will throw a custard pie in your face.

No one has applied to be our new admin! If you would like to be an admin, please read this post. If no one applies we may have to close down this site because we won’t have enough people to run it. So please apply now! We need all entries in by Wednesday.

The CPIP Tester item has finally been released. It is a red hard hat. I’m not a huge fan of the hard hat collection, but I really like this item. It is one of my favourite items and I wear it in my current look. The new book containing three lucky players’ stories has been released. I prefer the stories that were in last year’s book. WANNA BE AN ADMIN FOR THIS WEBSITE????? THEN GO TO THE POST BELOW AND READ THE DETAILS OF HOW YOU COULD BE THE NEWEST MEMBER OF THE CLUB PENGUIN GUIDE! GOOD LUCK!

We need a new administrator to help out on this site. Their job will be to update about any igloo related updates such as a new igloo catalog or furniture catalog. They will also be asked to update about the sports catalog, while I will continue to write about parties, clothing catalogs, newspapers, games and stage plays. If you would like to be an admin, please write a post as if you are writing about the current igloo catalog. It must not include big pictures, just the item icons that are traditionally used on this website. Please write your post on Microsoft Word and put the item icon at the top. When choosing an item icon, think about the item that best reflects the theme of the catalog. In the post, you must write about the special actions that can be performed by furniture items and what you think of them. You must also use good grammar and write properlly (”you” instead of “u”). Once your post is complete, please send it to crazymagic@hotmail.co.uk (my email). In the email, please include your penguin name and links to other websites you have worked on (if applicable). You will also be required to make a WordPress account to work on the site. If you already have a WordPress account, tell me in the email the email address you used to make your WordPress account. If you haven’t got on yet, make one at WordPress.com, but just do “Give me a Username” instead “Give Me a Blog”. You must send me your post by Wednesday 3rd June. Me and the rest of teh Club penguin Staff will then decide on a winner. Good Luck!

 

In other news, the CPIP testers like me still haven’t been given their item. I’m sure it will be out later today. I wonder what it will be?

 

I read Aguair’s anatomy on his blog. I found it humourous, so I have decided to make my own one. This is just a joke thing, giving alternative uses for my items. Enjoy!

The Wizard Hat is Charliemeth9’s favourite item. It is used to make him look taller than he really is. Something not many people know is that the Wizard Hat is a magical portal. Whenever someone tries to eat his cookies, Charliemeth9 just puts them into the hat and they teleport straight to his igloo.

The Red and Black Sailor Shirt is a very useful item in Charliemeth9’s inventory. He uses it to try and confuse his enemies with the stripes. He also uses it to pretend to be a zebra that likes to cover himself in strawberry jam.

This parrot is called Pete. If Charliemeth9 is ever in danger of being eaten by a hungry dragon, Pete will be used as a starter. He is also good at pooing on Charliemeth9’s enemies, as long as he has been fed a healthy diet of mud and cheese.

The Pirate Boots are mainly used because they are the only pair of shoes the CP Staff have given poor Charliemeth9 to protect him from the cold snow at his feet. However, they do have another use. The buckles can be traded in return for Charliemeth9’s freedom if he is ever kidnapped. The boots also make good containers and can carry large amounts of puffle poo.

The apple is Club Penguin’s 23rd pin. Apart from the fact that it is a healthy source of Vitamin C, the apple also has a shiny surface perfect for reflecting lasers away from him. The apple also served Charliemeth9 well when he kidnaped Yarr, as he carved the apple to look like the puffle so no one would notice he was missing. The Club Penguin Guide would like to point out that no puffles were harmed/repeatedly thrown ice at/rolled down the Ski Mountain in the making of this post.

The Vine Photograph is a useful item as it can give people paper cuts. It can also be used as a fake credit card to extract money from rich penguin’s bank accounts. I shouldn’t have said that should I? Fine- I’ll pay it back.

The Spy Phone is a useful item that can be used to make prank calls to the 118 118 team. It can also be used to pretend you’re talking to someone when annoying people come by. I regret to inform you that Charliemeth9’s previous spy phone was blown up by the PSA after Charliemeth9 got G drunk at a party and recorded him as he revealed all about how he murdered Aunt Arctic.

So, there it is folks, everything you need to know about Charliemeth9. The Club Penguin Guide would like to point out that this post is entirely fictional and none of the described events actually occured. Anatomy of the rest the CPG staff coming soon!